I don’t know who to attribute the adage too, pity, it’s so pithy

Cheap blackboard from that shop in Overport that sells Mr Price overruns and damaged goods + lick’a paint + stick’a scrap fabric + free paint sample cards from Builders’ Warehouse = smiley unco-ordinated piece for the tv-room.

Ever since I shacked up with the Other and got myself double-barelled, I find myself increasingly drawn to stores like Boardmans, @home and Mr Price Home Zone.

I can’t quite explain the science behind the magnetism, but say “silicon sunflower cake mould” and you could tweeze every single one of my generous nostril hairs (another gift from the makers of Bhamjee) and I’d still be focused on bundt pans.

That said, just look at these salt and pepper shakers! The holes do double-time (er… ok, that sounds very very wrong) as rudimentary facial features and exit points for the seasonings. I can hear you all go “Aw…agh toggie”, and if you’re not, what the fuck is wrong with you?
I got a set from @home this weekend (Alberto Mantilla knockoffs, they’d have to be at the price I paid).

picture source

Its brand story is an inspired conception; a narrative crafted to knead and unknot that part of the consumer’s brain responsible for decision-making.

So as someone who once studied that kind of thing to pass a few exams, I know that Hemingway and Picasso didn’t actually soak up their genius-vomit with the same oilskin-bound acid-free papers I see in Exclusive Books and hear with angel-song accompaniment.

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